I am…Pride

I love the tribal beat that begins Pride, and how it makes me want to scream the lyrics at the top of my lungs (plus Zac Barnett is a total hottie!).

It feels like I spend a lot of time thinking about who I am, but rarely sharing my whole self. I’m always doling out pieces of me: mother, wife, sister, friend or daughter. I want to give the best to everyone and have enough left for myself to savor. I may spend a fair deal of time by myself, but I still crave more. I have this pride that swells deep inside, and I’m ready let it surface.

I want to believe in myself with the most wholehearted trust. The truth is that I don’t want to give up, and I refuse to believe that my destiny in anything less than miraculous. I am never going to sell my soul. But I’m still ready to cash in on my charisma, and find fun ways to earn and spend lots and lots of money on my creative talents. And I want to have a blast doing it, feeling my unlimited potential.

Most of all, I want to live an authentically creative life, and manifest my wildest imagination. I want to express my unique self, and feel my light radiate joy. I want to reflect my wisdom and presence in my loved ones. I want to open my heart and my home, and share the intense beauty of my life.

We’ve always been a little different breed, and have created paths outside the mainstream culture. We’re both on the dorky side, and we’re unconventionally attractive. Sometimes I do feel like a fish out of water, like an island of my own making. It takes an effort not to feel isolated in this day and age. Our identities create barriers between us, but they can also reconnect us, if we open our hearts enough. Plus, our identities make our lives interesting and beautiful.

As we begin this new Yippie Chicks adventure, I feel compelled to share my full story with a pride that I have never truly felt. If I’m really honest with myself, I’ve always held deep shame of not being good enough. I’ve had a terrifying fear of rejection.

Recently I’ve had some breakthroughs around the idea of fame, and how I’ve always felt horrified by the thought of being famous. I’ve felt sorry for celebrities, and secretly relished the fact that there are in fact very few people who give a damn what I’m doing right now (the truth is that we are all so self-absorbed and self-conscious that we rarely ever truly connect).

I also know that I’ve wasted of lot of energy gauging my actions on how others would react, constantly prejudging and anticipating each other’s next move. It may help me succeed in the short term, but it’s an exhausting game, and I’m ready to take off the facades. I’m ready show my full rainbow colors, and feel my pride.

How does pride make you feel? What pride do you want to share?

Light and love,

Darcy Rose

 

 

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